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Show notes

This episode’s guest is author Aliya Ali-Afzal, whose debut novel “Would I Lie to You?” came out in July 2021. It is the story of Faiza, a stay at home mother, who has accidentally spent all of her family’s emergency fund and now desperately needs to get it back before her newly unemployed husband finds out.

We discussed:

• Money, power and motherhood - what happens when women with successful careers become financially dependent on their husbands?

• The impossibility of escaping criticism as a mother, whether you stay at home full time or have paid work;

• Why we’re uncomfortable talking about money;

• Talking about money in relationships, reconciling different approaches to money between partners;

• Why the financially controlled partner is not always as rational as they seem;

• Writing flawed and sympathetic protagonists;

• Discussing race and belonging as a theme in a book that is not about race;

• Using proxies to talk about money in ways that make it feel less vulnerable;

• Financial infidelity - what is it? Is it just keeping financial secrets or do the secrets have to have a negative impact on the partner? Is it something that individuals should define for themselves?

• The impact of failing to communicate effectively about money in relationships;

• How partners can avoid financial infidelity;

• What couples can do if financial infidelity has taken place.

(We also have another episode on money secrets in relationships with Dr Jane Major.)

You can follow Aliya on Twitter and Instagram.

“Wouid I Lie To You?” is a gripping read. It’s out now from Head of Zeus and Grand Central.